6:15 p.m. | 2003-02-19 Nurseries and Locksmiths. Last Spring, I went to the local garden nursery to buy some plants. I can�t go to a garden nursery or bookstore and not buy anything, so it�s a foregone conclusion that I�m gonna spend some money. It�s only a matter of how much. But I digress. I gathered up my must-have plants and proceeded to the cash register which was manned by a guy in his early 20s. I�ll call him James because that�s his name. And, I know this because he told me. This is that. (James:) Hi, I�m James! How�re you today? (CI:) Just great, thanks. How�re you? (James:) Oh, I�m doing just awful. I�m so tired. See, I haven�t gotten any sleep since my buddy moved in with me and my girlfriend. It�s the baby. See, my buddy and his girlfriend have a baby and they both got kicked out of their parents� homes so they didn�t have anywhere to go so� well, he called me. And, I just couldn�t, you know. I just couldn�t let them be homeless. Not that I really wanted them to live with us though. I wasn�t too happy about that at all. But the baby. You know, the baby and all. So I let them move in. Did you know that the baby DOES NOT sleep at night? No, it doesn�t sleep at all. It just cries and cries. It wakes me up, you know? Then I don�t get any sleep. See, I use to sleep just fine but now the baby keeps me awake all night. But what can I do? I can�t make the baby homeless. But, let me tell you this, don�t EVER let your buddy move in with his girlfriend and baby because you will never sleep again. EVER. Oh, it�s just awful. (CI:) So, are you and your girlfriend planning on having any kids anytime soon? (James:) OH MY GOD NO! They just cry, and then you can�t sleep and then you�re tired. No, it�s awful. I mean, babies are cute and all, but they don�t EVER sleep. (CI:) It�s very nice of you to help your buddy out like that. (James:) Well, I told him he better find a new place to live SOON because my place is just to small for the baby and all that stuff. And, I�m so tired. (CI:) Well, thanks. And, good luck. (James:) You�re welcome. And, thanks. I walked away chuckling at such unexpected and impassioned verbosity, opened the passenger door of my car, threw my keys and purse on the driver�s seat, placed the plants on the floor of my car, and shut the door. After I locked it. Yes, I locked my plants, purse and car keys in my car. I do that about once every 10 years just to make sure my car club membership is worth it. Anyway, I went and found James and he attempted to open my car door with various and sundry tools. None worked. Then he gave me the car club phone number � off his car club card � and let me use their phone to call them. Here�s that. (CarClub:) Thanks for calling car club. May I have your member number please? (CI:) Sorry, I don�t know my member number. It�s on my card which is in my purse which I locked in my car along with my keys. Hence, my phone call for assistance. (CarClub:) Sorry, I can�t help you if you�re not a member. (CI:) I AM a member. I�ve been a member for a VERY LONG time. However, I don�t know my member number off the top of my head. (CarClub:) Okay. Could you please look on the front of your card and read me your member number? (CI:) I would love to do just that. Trust me, I would. However, as I mentioned, my card is in my purse which I locked in my car along with my keys. (CarClub:) Sorry, I really can�t help you if you�re not a member. Would you like to become a member? (CI:) No. I�d like you to send someone out here to unlock my car so I can retrieve my car keys and my purse which contains my Car Club Member Card. (CarClub:) Would you like to speak to my supervisor? (CI:) Yes, I would. Thank you. (Super:) Thanks for calling car club. May I have your member number please? (CI:) Sorry, I don�t know my member number. It�s on my card which is in my purse which I locked in my car along with my keys. Hence, my phone call for assistance. (Super:) Okay, I can look you up by your name. Your name please? While I�m waiting for the locksmith, an elderly couple comes out to the parking lot, loads up their new plants and promptly locks her purse and his keys in their car. They were literally parked right next to me. This is that. (Husband:) Oops! I locked the keys in the car, we better go call the car club. (Wife:) Oh no! My purse is in the car. How are we gonna call the car club without our card? Oh, this is just terrible! (CI:) Don�t worry, the car club is already on their way because I locked my keys and purse in my car also. (Wife:) Really? And, they�re on their way? (CI:) Yeah. I wouldn�t bother calling them. I�m sure they�ll be glad to help you out when they get here. Sometimes, it�s easier to start with the locksmith and work backwards. your thoughts? seed flower