6:34 p.m. | 2003-05-23 Merry Christmas To Boss; Happy Birthday To Me. Today, Boss and I both realized that we were carrying around unredeemed gift cards. Boss had one to a home furnishing store that she received from me for Christmas, and I had one to a bookstore that I received on my last birthday nine months ago. We figured it was time for some consumer redemption so we went shopping at lunch. Of course, we insisted Colleague join us. Remember that neither Colleague nor I are �shoppers�. However, for me, that doesn�t apply if we�re talking about a bookstore. On the other hand, Boss is very much a shopper. We grabbed a quick lunch and then went to the home furnishing store. Oddly, for the first time ever, we �lost� Boss in the store. That�s never happened before. We usually hover in her vicinity while discussing non-shopping related things. Pathetically, Colleague ended up calling her on his cell phone to determine exactly where she was in the store. After she made her purchases, we headed to the bookstore. I was prepared this time. Usually, there are a whole bunch of books I want to purchase, but I forget what they are once I step into the bookstore. That�s never a "problem" because I can always find other books I want. This time I was prepared though. Many of the people I read here mention, review or recommend books in their diaries which capture my interest, so I wrote down 4 different books prior to our excursion. All 4 came from the current book list of tuff517. Thanks, Tuff! I quickly purchased 2 of the 4 that they had in stock, while Boss was browsing books and Colleague was thumbing through magazines. It�s amazing how well it works when you have a list ready and ask the salesperson for assistance in locating them. After my purchase, I found Boss. This is that. (Boss:) I�m think I�m going to get this book. Oh wait, this looks interesting. No, it�s too serious. I just want to read some trash. Speaking of trash, where�s Colleague? (CI:) Right over there. (pointing) I�ll go get him. She wandered up to the register to purchase her book while Colleague and I waited. I was just scanning the shelves, noting books of interest and such. Here�s that. (CI:) (Reading a book title out loud � it was something like �I married a shopaholic�.) Be grateful you didn�t marry a shopaholic Colleague you�d be so broke by now. (No offense to any shopaholics reading this, but it is an expensive habit.) (Colleague:) Speaking of shopaholics, where�s Boss? (CI:) She�s up at the cash register buying a book. As we were walking back to work, we had a rather interesting conversation. It went like this. (Colleague:) Well, what�d you expect? I�m just �trash� you know. (Boss:) CI?! You told him I said that? (CI:) Of course, cause you were just kidding and all. Besides, he called you a �shopaholic�. (Boss:) What?! You called me a shopaholic, Colleague? (Colleague:) Well, yeah. But, CI called you a �witch�. (CI:) Oh, you�re full of it Colleague; I never called her anything and you know it. (Boss:) You are so lying Colleague � I can see it in your face. You couldn�t tell a lie to save your life. So what did I add to my book collection? Hells Angels: A Strange and Terrible Saga (Hunter S. Thompson), and A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius (Dave Eggers). I took a closer look at both when I got home and noticed something that I�ve never seen in a book before. In Dave Eggers� book, he has a page entitled Rules and Suggestions For Enjoyment of This Book. It cracked me up and I wanted to reproduce it here, so I checked out the copyright restrictions first. I�m a very thorough reader and being legally oriented, I check that shit out. I don�t know if any of you have ever checked out the copyright restrictions before, but it�s a pretty standard statement. For example, here�s a standard copyright statement. All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. Published in the United States by Ballantine Books, a division of Random House, Inc., New York, and simultaneously in Canada by Random House of Canada Limited, Toronto. That said, here is the most original copyright statement I�ve ever read. All rights reserved under the International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. Published in the United States by Vintage Books, a division of Random House, Inc., New York. Random House is owned �in toto� by an absolutely huge German company called Bertelsmann A.G. which owns too may things to count or track. That said, no matter how big such companies are, and how many things they own, or how much money they have or make or control, their influence over the daily lives and hearts of individuals, and thus, like 99 percent of what is done by official people in cities like Washington, or Moscow, or Sao Paulo or Auckland, their effect on the short, fraught lives of human beings who limp around and sleep and dream of flying through bloodstreams, who love the smell of rubber cement and think of space travel while having intercourse, is very very small, and so hardly worth worrying about. ~ Dave Eggers, A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius I already know I�m going to love this book. I mean, if that�s the copyright statement, imagine what he�ll say in the rest of the book. your thoughts? seed flower