10:50 p.m. | 2006-04-05 False Anniversary. I was thinking that I’d come across my diaryland anniversary as of late. Prompted by gold membership reminder emails of course. But, yeah, not so much. I consulted my archives and discovered that I started my diary on May 4, 2002. I would’ve bet my life that I had started it in April, in the early days of April even, of 2001. I suppose it doesn’t matter – except that I want to think it does – when I started this whole diary thing. What’s important is that I update. Yet, I haven’t. Not lately. I have to say that I love, I LOVE, the diaryland community. I love comments, I love site statistics, I love meeting every single person I can possibly meet from diaryland. I love the phone calls, I love the emails. I don’t want to not be here. Except that I haven’t updated. At this point? I just hope you find my archives interesting because I don’t have much to say lately. Everyone goes through this stage, I suppose, but I don’t like it. I just, frankly, don’t have anything to say – you know, as an update. Except that I do. Stuff I can’t share though. It’s frustrating. I want to be clever, humorous and entertaining. At least, as far as entries go. There’s so much I can’t share, you know – the easy stuff, work and whatnot – so I have to dig deep and talk about what’s going on with me. That’s not so easy. I wish it was. So, I don’t update much. That’s not good. At least to me. So in a nutshell, I’m doing well, I think, but I’ve been focused on my heart. Trying to be all heart-healthy – which eliminates most of my audience I know – but there it is. However, I’m also now in a position to share some of my wisdom – hard earned wisdom at that – with other folks. I like that. Don’t know how successful I am at it, but I’m giving it my best shot. Lately, I’ve had an appreciative audience and I can’t tell you how great that is. Really. Unfortunately, I’ve had a difficult life – it’s been tough – but to share what I’ve learned and to have it fall upon receptive ears? Wow. I’d so much like to be that way here. To offer that kind of openness. To just be me in the here and now. And right now? I am. So, ask away. Right here and right now. Trust me, I have answers. Really, I do. your thoughts? seed flower