7:35 p.m. | 2002-10-04 Have You Ever Been To The Pretty Fountain? The other day, my Boss, my Colleague and I went to lunch at a local dive that has great food but we have to drive there so we don�t go there often. So my Boss told Colleague to drive us there. We always make him drive because his car (SUV) is the closest to our building, it�s huge (fits about 30 people or something), and we just don�t want to drive. As usual, my Boss ordered him to go get his car and pick us up at our building. As we were driving to the dive, Boss told Colleague that he had to take us to The Pretty Fountain after we ate lunch. (It�s on the way.) I started giggling right away. Colleague didn�t get suspicious about my giggling because I pretty much always laugh at anything Boss says. He probably thought I was giggling because she was treating him like a personal driver or something. Anyway, we went and ate lunch and then headed to The Pretty Fountain. Here�s a snippet. (CI:) Hey Colleague, have you ever been to The Pretty Fountain? (C:) No. (CI:) Do you even know what they sell or what kind of store it is? (C:) No. Okay, The Pretty Fountain is a party supply/craft store. But it�s a funky party supply/craft store. And, it�s two stories. It has this kind of stuff: plastic eye balls, rubber bouncy balls, candy necklaces, stickers, magic-eight balls, plastic fruit-shaped containers with Kool-Aid in them, ribbons, napkins, plates, tablecloths, balloons, plastic cockroaches, plastic army men, glue guns, stamps, confetti, etc. It�s, in short, a cheap sort of Estrogen City. It�s Trinket Town and then some. As we were waiting for a parking place and watching people enter and exit The Pretty Fountain, this is what was said. (CI:) Okay Colleague, have you noticed anything in particular about the demographics of The Pretty Fountain consumer? (C:) Yes I have. They all look really happy when they go in the store and really happy when they come out. I guess it�s a happy kind of store. (CI:) Have you noticed, well um, a lack of male consumers? (C:) No I haven�t but now that you mention it, I haven�t seen any men go in or out of that store. Poor Colleague � we are kind of abusive sometimes. Anyway, we went into the store and these were his first words: �Oh my!� It was akin to us slipping him some acid and then taking him to a slumber party. Women were climbing over each other, people were grabbing things by the handfuls and, since it�s October, there were skeletons and witches and such everywhere. And, of course, every time you walked past one, some sort of sound was emitted. He actually said: �I feel like a bull in a china shop�. We all got into the Halloween spirit and tried on costume hats. First, Boss donned a bonnet. (Boss:) Do I look like a baby or something else? I mean what is this thing? (CI:) It�s a bonnet and you don�t look like a baby. It�s not a baby bonnet. (Boss:) Well then, what do I look like? (CI:) Um, kind of like �Little House on The Prairie� but a Hispanic version. Kind of. (Let�s just say it�s not her kind of hat.) (Boss:) You try one on so I can see. (CI:) (Puts a bonnet on.) (Boss:) OH, MY GAWD! It�s �Little House on The Prairie�! (C:) How do I look? (Boss & CI:) (We turn to look at Colleague and totally bust out. He was wearing a zebra-print pimp hat.) Uh, well� (laughing too hard to speak.) At this very moment, an armored-car guy (the folks who go around picking up cash at places) walked by. His uniform was so new, pressed and crisp, and he was so young and looking all like a wanna-be cop, that it looked like he was wearing a Halloween costume. That made me laugh. Then I laughed even harder when he took one look at Colleague in the pimp hat and immediately put his hand on his gun. (FYI: Colleague is an upper-middle class, 38-year-old white man, with a belly and all. He is anti-pimp looking, to say the least.) (C:) What about this? (Donning a skunk hat � think round, furry cap with a tail but looking like a skunk.) (Boss:) You look like Jacky Gleason! There was more wacky fun and then we left. I still can�t believe we took Colleague to The Pretty Fountain. But you gotta agree that he�s a good sport. Especially since we do this type of shit to him all the time. And, what did we purchase? Nothin�. It was a priceless experience though. your thoughts? seed flower