8:33 p.m. | 2002-10-16 Could My Life Get Any Funnier? Geesh, I had to come home so I could quit laughing. Seriously. I went to work, went out and about at lunch and stopped by a friend�s house on the way home. I swear I had to come home before I spontaneously combusted from laughing too damned hard. Even now, I�m still chuckling. I�m not even sure I can write a cohesive entry because my mind is still trying to absorb all the hilarity of my day. First, after getting settled at work, I checked my email inbox. I noticed an email from a professional guy who I�m working with currently. (Note, this is a different professional guy than the one I wrote about recently; I�ve never written about THIS professional guy before.) I was thinking something new had come up until I looked at the subject line. This was my first thought. �Oh SHIT. I don�t think he meant to email this.� To confirm this thinking, I opened the email. Then I thought this. �OH MY GAWD! I�m quite sure he didn�t mean to email me this. Oh, he�s going to have a heart attack and die if/when he realizes he sent this to me. He must have sent it to everyone in his address book and forgot that I was in that there group.� See, everyone else in that group was male and probably work buddies. This was not an email you would send to a woman, and certainly not a woman you don�t normally work with and whom you�ve only spoken with a few times. I wasn�t offended by the email because I don�t offend easily and I realized it was probably a mistake. Besides, I was too busy cringing on his behalf to be offended. Even if he did it on purpose, I wouldn�t be offended by the email but I would be confused as to why he would do something that was inappropriate considering the nature and brevity of our work relationship. He�s always been quite professional in our conversations, emails and such. Instantly, I thought that I should call him and let him know that he �accidentally� sent me this email. Then, I thought maybe I shouldn�t call him because he would probably have a heart attack when I told him that he sent it to me even though I would assure him that I wasn�t offended or anything. I couldn�t figure out what to do right then, so I checked my other emails and eventually forgot about it. At the end of the day, I remembered it again so I guess I should call him tomorrow and let him know about it. God where�s Uncle Bob when you need him? He would know what I should do. So onward. It�s National Boss� Day so I sent her an email telling her that she�s the greatest boss in the world, of course. Then I had to badger her into checking her emails so she could get my happy message. Geesh. Anyway, Colleague and I decided to take her out to lunch. (Frankly, Boss� Day confuses her and embarrasses her so she always says she doesn�t �celebrate� Boss� Day. However, she said she�d certainly let us buy her lunch.) She chose a restaurant and we were off to lunch. We got within a block of the restaurant (we�re walking), and suddenly we notice that we can�t proceed because both ends of the block are taped off with yellow, law enforcement, DO NOT CROSS tape. There are also tons of cop cars, fire trucks and emergency vehicles in and around the area. People are rushing out of the area mumbling �oh, a bomb�. So does that deter us? Oh hell no. We turn down a street and proceed to cut through the alley. At the end of the alley, we�re walking past emergency personnel taping the area. Colleague goes up to one of them and asks if we �could� go to the restaurant. He said we could if we wanted to. I�m berating Colleague and telling him that he said we �could� go there but he should have asked him if it was �safe� to go there. I mean, god knows law enforcement and emergency people aren�t going to go stepping on our constitutional right to move about freely. We might sue them and all. But, it�s not like they would recommend that we go into an area in which a bomb has been placed. Colleague is thinking we�re cool because we get to the restaurant before they�ve taped off our access. Boss and I are thinking that we might not want to eat in a restaurant that might explode. As we go into the restaurant, Boss and I overrule Colleague and tell him we�re going somewhere else. When we exit the restaurant, we see that we are now within the DO NOT CROSS area. Boss asks an emergency guy if it�s safe to be here; he says �probably not�. See, it�s important to ask the right questions. Here�s a quip. (CI:) See Boss? I�m trying to take you out to lunch because you�re the best boss in the world and Colleague here is trying to blow you up into a million pieces. (Colleague:) He said we could go here. (CI:) Yes he did. He said we �could�. He didn�t say it was �safe� or that we �should� go here. You think he cares if some idiots want to blow themselves up? What the hell are you doing? Are you trying to kill us? Lord, you need help. (Boss:) Lets go somewhere AWAY from here. Far away. So we went to a �European� restaurant that does have a large variety of Americanized European foods. And, I�m getting tired so I�ll leave you with this gem found on the restaurant marquee menu. Peasant Lunch A cup of soup, and a fresh green salad, served with our own dark peasant Apparently, they ran out of room on the marquee. I think the next word was supposed to be �bread�, but who knows? By the way, just to be on the safe side, none of us ordered the Peasant Lunch. your thoughts? seed flower