7:06 p.m. | 2003-02-21 Law School Finals Follies. It�s a proven fact that law school finals cause insanity and profanity. In some cases, it�s just a temporary condition, in others, it�s a more permanent condition. Now, you may not have read any published studies about this phenomenon, but that�s only because there�s a cover-up scheme involved. It�s a tightly held secret because if people knew that, they wouldn�t go to law school, there�d be fewer lawyers and it would cause an economic imbalance. Wouldn�t that be just horrible? My law school study buddy, Huffy, serves as a great example. Let me back up a bit. I was determined to have a female study buddy because I didn�t want to deal with any jealous girlfriend/wife situations, and I didn�t want anyone to get hurt. See, in the class before me (Boss Former Boss� class), a gentleman was murdered by his female study buddy�s crazy, jealous, ex-boyfriend because he thought they were having an affair. They weren�t. In fact, the gentleman was engaged to be married, and would have gotten married had he not been killed first. Anyway, it turns out that you don�t really pick your study buddy; it�s just something that happens. It takes a particular match of temperaments to navigate successfully through the finals process. See, your whole grade is based solely on how you do on the final exam so people tend to be a little tense during that time. And, if you miss an exam, well then, you�re just shit out-of-luck. At my school, you could get excused from an exam but you had to then take it the next time it was offered (i.e., one year later). Now Huffy was quite temperamental during exam time. What follows is an example of a typical day-in-the-life that was Huffy during finals. (Huffy:) Fuck these fucking people! They�re all fuckheads! (CI:) What�s up, Huffy? (Huffy:) Well, I went to work today (he was a paralegal at a large firm) and my partner (the partner he worked for) sent me down to pick up some trial exhibits at the copy store. So I did. And he didn�t give me the fucking firm credit card so I had to pay $300 fucking bucks out of my own fucking pocket to pick up the goddamn exhibits. Now, I have to turn in a fucking expense report to get reimbursed. (CI:) Man, that�s low. (Huffy:) Yeah, so I told him to FUCK OFF! (CI:) You told your partner to fuck off? (Huffy:) Yeah. That fucking bastard pissed me off. Then I came to school and I couldn�t get on the computer and I got pissed off and told the computer lab guy to take a flying fuck. And, he told me that, if I was unhappy, I had to talk to the Dean of Students. (CI:) So did you? (Huffy:) Yeah, I did. And she gave me the run around so I called her a fucking bitch and slammed her door on the way out. (CI:) You called her a fucking bitch? (Huffy:) Yeah. She is too. Everyone hates her. (CI:) I know. (Huffy:) Hey, can I have one of your fries? (CI:) Sure, help yourself. Huffy was married, however, I never had a problem with his wife. In fact, we were great friends. She always told me how much she loved that fact that I was his study buddy because, whenever he acted up, she�d tell him to call me. He would talk to me and then he�d calm down. He just needed to blow off some steam is all. And, amazingly, he never got in trouble for any of the stuff he said or did during finals time. He accumulated a humungous amount of speeding tickets though as cops don�t really like being called �fucking fuckheads�. Nor do they like being told to fuck off. your thoughts? seed flower