5:48 p.m. | 2003-11-23 Almost There. Tomorrow (the 24th) will mark the one-year anniversary since MyDad died of a sudden heart attack. They � whoever �they� are � say that the first year is the hardest. Now, I�m not a true believer in strict mourning guidelines as every one handles death differently. However, in this case, the first-year rule seems to fit. Not that I�ll care any less, but as time goes on, the focus starts shifting from death to life. The basics are over with, you know, the funeral, the spreading of the ashes, and the anticipation of seeing him when I see StepMom. Oddly, last night, I decided to find a photo for this very cool, but odd-sized, picture frame that I have. I pulled out my picture box and started going through it. Surprisingly, I found a small picture of MyDad and Stepmom that I don�t recall ever seeing before. Nor do I know where it was taken. It�s pretty recent though, and captures their spirits as well as their images. Plus, it�s exactly the right size. So, it�s now officially the first photo I�ve put up in my Dreamspace. A lot has happened in that first year. His death was followed by the deaths of 4 other family members. I�ve moved, my job is changing, the first great grandson of MyDad is on his way into the world, many of my friends have moved away, etc. Shoot, even the HotelManager is changing this week. (The former managers were only here for about 9 months; they�re leaving to start their own business, so I wish them luck.) I have new neighbors too. I haven�t met them, but I did meet the new HotelManager when I was out front gardening today. Anyway, I feel relieved that, by tomorrow night, I will have survived the first year. Anyone who�s lost a parent knows that it�s a very singular event. And, it�s tough. your thoughts? seed flower