9:36 p.m. | 2003-12-25 Aye Matey, Happy Holidays. You might recall that I planned to spend Christmas Day at YoungerSister�s (YS) house, with YSHusband, YSMotherInLaw and, of course, with LittleNephew (LN). And, I did. Now, I�ve never been to any of home of YS�s since, well, she was in high school or something. (Excepting for that time period when she lived with EldestSister after graduating college.) This past June or so, YS and YSHusband actually bought a home in a town (YSTown) that�s only 20 miles from my place. Anyway, it�s pretty much a straight shot to their place now, which is very cool. I found it without any trouble, gathered up all my gifts and rang the doorbell. I couldn�t see inside, but I could hear LN shouting: �Momma, Aunt Cruel-Irony�s here! Hurry Mom, it�s Aunt Cruel-Irony! She�s here. Mom, Aunt Cruel-Irony�s here! He couldn�t see me but apparently, he was expecting me. However, I rang the bell while YS was running the garbage disposal so she didn�t hear it. LN persisted and YS eventually answered the door. And, they have a very cool house. Very cool. I think I was there for maybe 15 minutes before I was challenged, by LN, to a sword fight. That wasn�t quite what I had in mind, but before long, I was running all over YS�s house making pirate noises while fending off a seriously energetic three-year-old with a plastic sword. I was often confused as he randomly shouted out lines from his favorite movies. To wit. (LN:) Ready? (CI:) Uh, sure. (LN:) MOVE OUT! (CI:) What? Wait a minute. Are we part of a sword squadron? Move out? Do we have troops? Is this a, um, holy war or something? I thought we were fighting each other. (LN:) (Busy lunging at me and smacking me with his sword.) (CI:) Wait! Time out! I�m confused. (YS:) He�s quoting lines from this movie. Ignore that. (CI:) Oh okay. On guard LittleNephew. Let the fight begin. So, I don�t know, I participated in approximately 43 sword fights today. Not all of them were fair either. Nor were the �rules�. See, I opted to be a pirate so I had to fight with one eye closed while making pirate noises and gestures. While I was running. Backwards mostly � LN doesn�t really jostle; he wields his sword like a bat. Without doing any property damage. In someone else�s home. And, without actually hitting LN. It was close sometimes. Plus, I had to use the homemade sword, while LN had a store-bought plastic one. However, I think mine was the better one. It was fashioned out of a plastic hanger, a dowel and electrician tape. It was good for defense, which was great since I didn�t really think that I should take an offensive approach when matched with a wee one. I have to say though, that LN smacked me really hard a couple of times. I think he�s got sword fighting and baseball kind of mixed up. I was all about fencing; he was all about hitting me into the outfield. He also, inadvertently, took advantage of my ignorance of all current children�s movies. This is that. (LN:) (Pointing his sword at me.) You must leave right now. Off with you now! (CI:) (Withdrawing my sword.) What? I have to leave? Did you just banish me from your house? Before dinner, even? I have to leave now? (LN:) (Looking quizzically at me.) (YS:) He�s quoting from this movie. Ignore that. (CI:) Oh, okay. On guard, LittleNephew. I was exhausted within the first half-hour. I called �recess� and LN wandered downstairs to watch TV with YSHusband while I visited with YS and YSMotherInLaw. It was a welcome respite as sword fighting isn�t one of my normal daily activities. Anyway, dinner was great, the company was wonderful and I got my exercise today. The drive home went well and I�ve been able to chill out. And, I now know how to make my own sword. You know, if I need one and all. (Keep that in mind leebozeebo. Perhaps that�ll be the next addition to my arsenal.) On guard, I say. On guard. your thoughts? seed flower