10:04 p.m. | 2005-11-06 Easy Question, Tough Answer. Someone recently asked me about how I came about causing my fibro to go into remission. Perfectly legitimate question. One that I can�t answer easily. I can answer it honestly, but only from my own personal experience. Fibro is tricky like that. Everyone who suffers from it suffers differently. The only commonality is the pain. Pain you wouldn�t wish on your worst enemy. Seriously. One thing that I did was compare all the symptoms that I had in childhood with the symptoms I had in adulthood. What amazing correlation. That made me understand that it wasn�t new. The severe manifestation was new, but not unusual. I�d been in pain for a long time. And, lets talk about that pain. It�s true and it�s mind-boggling. There�s a range of course, but there it is. It can floor you. Much like it did me on many occasions. When I first felt it, I ignored it. I was busy. With a capital B. Working fulltime and going to school fulltime. Yeah. No time. It progressed until I cried uncle. Still, I fought against it. Until I no longer could. When I could no longer walk, I took notice. It�s sad really, when it gets that bad. I was having major spasms on a regular basis, had extreme limitations with mobility and could not stand to shake hands due to pain. I spent several years at that point. All through law school actually. I thought I had to achieve that before I could rest. And, so what? I have a juris doctorate degree. (I like that part actually.) However, I paid an astronomical price for it� both financially and physically. Yet, that degree, or any of the others, does not define me. So how did I end up in that predicament? A law school student suffering from fibro? Oh, well, that was my path. See, my youth was not good. My parents, bless their hearts, had their own dilemmas. Us kids? Left to our own devices. Fortunately, my parents were basically good people. Nonetheless, we started taking care of ourselves as toddlers. We were encouraged to do just that. Not only to take care of ourselves but to take care of them and to maximize our potential. We heard that a lot. And, at 17 I was left homeless. My mother remarried and moved to another town. My father did her one better and moved to different county. I was left without parents, without a home, without money, and without, well, anything. That kind of situation tends to either motivate a person or devastate them. I was motivated. But, it was hurtful. I grew up thinking I would leave the �nest�, I never thought the nest would leave me. (Just to note, my parents weren�t evil people. They were just raised to believe that once a child graduates from high school, they�re an adult � ready to take on the world. Much like they were. Albeit, they had much more assistance from their parents. Just a different point of view, I suppose.) That�s just one thing I�ve experience in my life. Mind you, it�s was a significant moment much like all the deaths, being raped, moving from state to state, being disowned and worrying on a daily basis were my next meal was coming from. It�s all there and it�s called stress. Except when you reinvent all that energy and call it �inspiration�. Which, of course, is what I did. I worked and I studied and I worked and I studied and I worked and I studied. All in a frantic effort to avoid the big huge elephant in my life. Soon, all the negative started to settle into my head. It made me miserable which propelled me to work and study harder. Once I started doing that, the negative settled into my muscles. It weighed me down. More and more each day. All that energy became pain, severe pain, that weighted every single muscle in my body. Even the teeny tiny ones in my toes. Hence the fibro. Again, let me state that this has been my experience. Not necessarily yours. I got sick of it. I got sick of being sick. I got sick of the pain. I got sick of sitting on the sidelines of my life. So, I set out to change all that. For me? Well, I had to cure the psychic pain first. I didn�t know, at the time, that it�d �cure� the physical pain � and I�m not sure that it did � just I knew that it was time to deal with all of it. In it�s entirety. You only get one life. Honestly, I don�t know what�s made my fibro go into remission. What I do know is that it coincided with the healing of my heart. Well, outside the cholesterol issue. That�s a whole different story there. your thoughts? seed flower