10:07 p.m. | 2005-11-30 Know Your Limits. My last entry has me thinking about another memorable client. Again, I was working intake and processing. That day, my CounterMate (CM) and I were busy chatting while processing the many files on our desks. Not unexpectedly, a couple of people walked in and approached the counter. I was busy so I didn�t look up. However, out of the corner of my eye, I saw CM bolt, actually bolt towards the restroom. I didn�t know why she moved so quick but whatever. I looked up. Then I knew. I watched a man guide a woman to the counter. The woman�s face was horribly disfigured � from burns, best I could tell � and the gentleman escorted her because she was obviously blind. I approached the counter. (CI:) Good morning. How can I help you? (Man:) My sister, �Beth� has an appointment with So-and-So. (CI:) Okay. Hi Beth, I�m Cruel-Irony. (Beth:) Hi. (CI:) The papers you�re carrying� So-and-So asked you to bring them? (Beth:) Yes. (CI:) Great. I�ll take those and let her know you�re here. It�ll be just a moment. Please have a seat while you�re waiting. (Beth:) Thank you. (CI:) Sure. I pulled the file, clipped her papers to it and delivered it to So-and-So who took it from there. Then, I went in search of CM. She�d been gone for a long time and I was concerned. I found her in the ladies restroom. Frankly, she was shook up. Here�s what happened when I discovered her. (CM:) Thanks. I�m sorry. (CI:) Sorry? For what? Are you okay? (CM:) I�m sorry for leaving you to deal with that. (CI:) To deal with what? (CM:) With her. I�m sorry. I thought I was gonna throw up when I saw her. I still feel sick. I�m sorry. It�s wrong I know but she looks terrible. Those scars. Oh, I�m gonna be sick. (CI:) Sit. Put your head between your knees. Good. You�re fine. (CM:) I can�t handle that. (CI:) That�s fine. It�s okay. (CM:) Doesn�t it bother you? Her scars? (CI:) Her scars? No. It bothers me that she�s here because I�m guessing she was in a horrible accident which caused her scars and her blindness, but no. Her scars don�t bother me outside of that. Her whole life has changed, I�m sure� that�s what bothers me. (CM:) I feel so stupid because her scars make me feel sick. (CI:) That�s not stupid; you�ve probably just never seen a disfigurement like that before. I have. Lots of times. (CM:) Really? How can you stomach that? (CI:) Scars? They�re just superficial. I�m sure it looks awful if you�re not use to it, but really, it�s just physical. She can�t see them so why should I? I sure she�s not the same person she was before the accident, but she�s still just a person. Like me. Like you. (CM:) Has she left? (CI:) Yeah. She�s gone. (CM:) I�m sorry for my reaction. (CI:) Don�t be. It�s normal. What�s really great is that you came here instead of trying to help her. Everybody has limits and you should know what they are. Seriously. You�re so great with people but you would�ve been horrible with her. That�s okay. You did the right thing. It�s so odd to think that whole experience happened when I was in my early twenties. And, CM is almost ten years older than me and still one of my best friends. I gained so much respect for her during that exchange. I mean, she just knew what she could handle and what she couldn�t. She knew better than to jump into something she couldn�t deal with. I totally respected her for that. Still do. I respect the honesty. She felt horrible feeling and sharing the fact that the woman�s disfigurement made her feel ill. It repulsed her. Understandably. But, not a lot of people would be that honest about it. That�s one reason CM and I have remained friends for more than 20 years. The next day, I pulled Beth�s file. She was involved in a multi-car accident which caused her car to burst into flames. She wasn�t at fault in any way. Prior to the accident, she was a vibrant, beautiful, fully-sighted young woman in her early twenties. Afterwards? Still vibrant yet horribly disfigured, blind and well, disabled. She underwent multiple operations, lost her independence and still, still had to put up with her brother. The guy that escorted her that day. At one point, he stepped away for several minutes. That�s when she told me that she hated that part� the part where she had to put up with her brother all the time now. �Brothers, they�re such a pain, you know?� she said. �Yeah, they certainly are.� I agreed. Not that I really know since I only have sisters. But, I knew what she was talking about. Siblings? They can be the biggest pain in the world. Albeit, one of the best pains you�ll ever have. I�ll always remember Beth and I�ll always respect CM. Most importantly, I�ll always understand why they could never meet each other. your thoughts? seed flower