7:10 p.m. | 2003-01-03 My Tax Dollars� Hard At Work. Last Wednesday, I diligently took the trash out to the curb as is custom in MyTown. On Thursday morning, well, nothing happened. The trash truck didn�t come and pick up my trash as it usually does. I waited a couple of days and hauled my trashcan back into my yard. I�m flexible; I shrugged it off. This Wednesday, I again diligently took the trash out to the curb. On Thursday morning, well, nothing happened. Again, I left it out at the curb, but this time I called MyTown today. Here�s that. (MyTown:) Thank you for calling MyTown. How can I help you? (CI:) Hi. My name is Cruel-Irony and my garbage hasn�t been picked up for 2 weeks. (MyTown:) Oh no. What�s your address? (CI:) MyHouse, MyStreet. (MyTown:) Your regular garbage man is on vacation so you�ve had a temporary person. Let me take a look. Well, he picked up all the cans on your street� well, except the cans on your block. (I live on a long street. My guess? He was talking on his cell phone when he got to my block, or he saw a cute chick, or he saw a cute chick while talking on his cell phone, or he was talking to a cute chick on his cell phone. Something along those lines.) (CI:) What do I need to do now? I mean, my can�s pretty full and all. (MyTown:) Yeah, I bet it is. Did you leave it on the street? (CI:) Yes. (MyTown:) Good, then you don�t have to do anything because he�s supposed to go back and pick up that block today. Did you call someone at your house to see if it�s been emptied? (CI:) Well, no. There isn�t anyone at my house. (MyTown:) What time do you get off work? (CI:) 5:00pm. (MyTown:) Okay, we�ll be here until 6:15pm, so if it�s not empty when you get home, call us and we�ll have it emptied tomorrow. (CI:) Okay. Thanks. When I got home, my can was empty. In addition to that little problem, I encountered another odd situation today. When I left my house this morning, I noticed a piece of litter in my front yard. It was a �pink slip� from the post office. They leave a pink slip if a package doesn�t fit in your mailbox; they leave a yellow slip if it�s something you have to sign for. Except they usually leave it in the mailbox instead of just randomly in your front yard. However, the only thing written on my slip was my house numbers. Normally, it says who sent the package, when you can pick it up and the date they tried to deliver it. It has your local post office preprinted on it, except the post office on this slip wasn�t mine. So, in addition to calling MyTown, I also called the United States Postal Service (USPS). This is that. (CI:) Hi, my name is Cruel-Irony and I found a pink slip in my front yard but it only has my house numbers on it and it isn�t filled out and dated so I don�t know if I need to pick up a package or not. Plus, it doesn�t have my post office on it. (USPS:) Okay. I can�t tell you if you have a package or not, but I can call and tell them to re-deliver it if you do. Would you like me to do that? (CI:) Uh, yes please. So, as it stands, I may or may not have a package and I may or may not have to pick it up. Life is full of surprises. And, speaking of surprises, I did receive a couple of packages in my mailbox today. One was a tax package from my accountant, to make sure the folks mentioned above get paid, but the other was a package full of fun stuff from my buddy tuff517. Tuff, you�re one of the coolest bastards I know� Fuckin� A! your thoughts? seed flower