7:57 p.m. | 2003-04-24 Sizing Things Up. I�m really bad at determining things like distance, height, size, etc., by sight. Feet, as a unit of measure, or centimeters for that matter, don�t really mean anything to me. They�re just numbers that are assigned to things. For example, I�m about 5�0� tall but I don�t really have a concept of how tall � or short � that is. It only means something when compared to other people/objects. Or when I can�t reach something. For example, if something is taller than me, then it�s more than 5 feet; if something�s shorter than me, it�s less than 5 feet. It could be 6 feet or 2 feet, but I can�t really determine that unless I compare it again to something else. Anyway, today, I was trying to visualize how tall a particular person is without actually having seen that person. For tall people, Colleague (C) is my benchmark unit of measure. I�m sure he�s very honored that he can be of such service. But, suddenly, I forgot exactly how tall he is so I called him. This is that. (C:) This is Colleague. (CI:) How tall are you? (C:) 6�2�. (CI:) So, you�re as tall as Hippy Chick. (The co-worker who sits the closest to me.) (C:) Well actually, I think she�s a couple of inches taller. (CI:) She wears heels, Colleague. Last time I checked, you don�t. Not at work anyway. (C:) She wears heels? Oh. Are they about 2�? (CI:) Yes. (C:) Then, yes, I am the same height as Hippy Chick. And, I don�t ever wear heels. Because, you know, they hurt my feet. (CI:) Well, maybe you should. They make your legs look better. (That whole �bad for your feet but make your legs look better� thing is often a subject of discussion when we�re people watching.) Remember, it �does make a difference�. (Quoting Colleague.) (C:) I�ll keep that in mind. (CI:) Well, that�s all I called for. Thanks. Now, the difference between 6�2� and 6�4� is not really noticeable to me. Both are way taller than me. I do notice when someone�s significantly taller than Colleague. And typically, those guys are current or former basketball players. However to me, they are just �way taller than Colleague�. What is very noticeable to me about tall folks is that they tend to step on me. Especially Colleague. And, they have a long stride so I often have to walk really, really fast to keep up. Oh, and when they swing their elbow back, they hit me square on the bridge of my nose. When they gesticulate while talking, they often hit me in the face, head and shoulders. Plus, they don�t tend to look at the floor very often. That�s why Colleague never noticed that Hippy Chick wears heels � he doesn�t look at or see people�s feet. Which, consequently, is why he steps on mine all the time. I, on the other hand, have a very special (or spatial) relationship with the floor/ground. Because we�re so close. And, I�m used to looking up a lot as pretty much everyone, with the exception of children under 8 or so, is taller than me. However, I don�t see the tops of things much. I�ll guarantee you that, right at this very moment, the top of my refrigerator is disgustingly dirty. I rarely clean it, because I don�t see it. Shit, I can barely reach it. Another thing I haven�t been seeing is Boss� drop-dead-handsome-albeit-gay stepson because she moved his picture to the top of her bookcase. It used to be on her credenza, but she ran out of room and moved him. I realized that today and pointed it out. She apologized and told me she�ll blow up his picture and hang it on the wall behind her desk. A point to this bit of rambling? I didn�t start with one so I�ll just make one up. Everyone has different perspectives about life, things and experiences. So I guess I've offered to let you to step into (or onto) my shoes for a moment. Life is a whole different experience when viewed from another angle. Suggested Reading: Check out Moving Target by Giallothang. If I could say it that well, I would. New Reading: Welcome puter-chique to Diaryland. She�s got some interesting and fun things to say. Oh, and try not to step on us little folks. And, don�t �pick us up just to say hello�. It�s only funny the first time. your thoughts? seed flower